"Which" and "what" had been the words I have heard the most for years.
- Sara, Which one? Which career? Are you still hesitant?
I've been asking myself what to study for years.
When I got in 4th ESO I had to choice among sciences and humanities.
My parents were the ones who chose, because I couldn't do it by myself.
I loved Biology, I hated Spanish and I couldn't stand Literature, but I enjoyed Catalan and History.
My mates and I were tested, our teachers and the psychologist made us do some kind of intelligence and vocational test. Then we were called one by one and told what would be better for us, like which branch of knowledge we should choose to study.
I was freaking out, how could a test show them what I was good at, if I loved and hated parts of all branches. However, inside of me, I truly wished they could give me some answers.
Unluckily they didn't help me at all.
Our useless conversation was like:
-Fina! I've been looking forward its results for weeks. Tell me!
- Sara, your test isn't as revealing as we deserved, you enjoy both areas and we think you are able to study both of them. So..
congratulations!
It was the worst "mark" I've ever received, excluding when I failed Religion six years before then.
So I (my parents) chose Scientific bachillerato so as to keep doors opened.
The summer after I finished 4th, I realized I wanted to study Chemistry.
My aunt is a chemist, my uncle is a chemist my cousin is a chemist, and I wanted to be one of them.
I worked hard on Maths and Chemistry during 1st Bach. but I didn't do my best in the rest of subjects because I've always been such a good student that this year for once in my life I wanted to have fun! Going out with my friends instead of staying home reading or studying.
So I had a normal medium mark, a seven .. something. I can't remember it exactly.
The summer after 1st Bach. was a great holiday. I spent July in the UK, exactly in Worthing, a beautiful town close to Brighton. I improved my English in one month more than I could have in two or three years here.I realized I wanted to meet people from other sides of the world, and the only way I could, would be by learning other languages. So here comes the problem. Chemistry has such a low access mark but Translation is not the same stuff. I would have to study more than hard if I wanted to reach that new mark.
Well, sorry I lied to you before, but that wasn't the bigger problem I had chosen scientific bachillerato and so I would have to study Maths, Physics, Chemistry and Biology. I bet on the wrong horse.
My last term was completely awful, the constant feeling of not being able to reach my goal has been such a heavy load for me during twelve months.
But after all this suffering I reached that, the place I am today, which really is the place I wanted to be yesterday.
Now I have a worse problem, I realized this is not the career I want to study.
Yes, I also consider myself stupid and I don't blame you if you think I am.
It takes me time, to be able to recognize what I don't want but even more time, what I do want.
So now, I study Translation and Interpretation of languages and I'll start studying 2nd Bach. to repeat "Selectivity exams" again, because Microbiology access mark is higher than Translation.
Stop the world, I want to get off..